I miss Moon Moon can we bring him back?
OMFG MOON MOON
Andy. Los Angeles. Atheist. Polyamorous/relationship anarchist. Kinkster. I like things. Let's fuck.
How does one convey, in any sort of meaningful manner, why one didn’t tell a loved one about something that happened? Why one didn’t know how to talk about it at the time? Something that was by no means unacceptable, but that really went straight to the core of one’s own sexuality?
How does one convey that inner conflict, that struggle, that coming to terms with oneself, that prevents one from being 100% forthcoming with someone? That awareness that, by saying something, one would have been ripping open and exposing a key part of one’s identity that the person was not only unprepared to discuss, but that the person is also unprepared to fully understand themself at the time?
Because I certainly don’t seem to know how.
Being sick and sleep-deprived certainly does not help one come up with words.
I wound up spending last night at Canvas’ place. We had a very low-key non-sexy evening, watching TV (a few episodes of Parks & Recreation, which I’d never actually seen, followed by Monsters University, which was adorable) over beers and snacks. I made a judgment call that it probably wasn’t the safest idea to drive home, so I crashed at his place. Aside from the facts that 1) he snores and 2) I never sleep well when I’m not in my own bed, he’s got a fantastically cuddleable body and nice snuggling with him was a lovely experience.
It was also a reminder that I need to snuggle with Blondie more. Since she and I usually go to bed at wildly different times, we don’t do that nearly enough.
Canvas and Blondie have both been sick, so—surprise, surprise—I’m starting to feel a little icky now. Great. At least I’ll have Oy to keep me company when the full force of whatever bug I’m getting hits.
Blondie’s off to San Antonio early tomorrow morning, so I’ll have the bed to myself for a couple nights. I’m supposed to see Storm and a bunch of her friends tomorrow evening, but I’m not sure if sickness and/or work will derail those plans. I guess we’ll see.
While I’m certainly accustomed to receiving these sorts of emails from women I’ve messaged on okcupid, this is the first time I’ve ever gotten a rejection email from someone I don’t remember ever seeing and have certainly never messaged. Dafuq?
3 way relationships and open relationships are what give gay guys their awful, slutty image. I hate guys who think because they're gay it means it's completely acceptable to sleep around, have multiple partners, have partners way too young or old for them, think it's their right to be treated equally while behaving more like animals than civilised, committed couples in a relationship. It just isn't right and it isn't fair for the rest of the gay community who don't feel that way. Your view?
Asked by Anonymous
Where do i even begin with this. lol
I just love the way you threw such a sloppy wad of ignorance at me and then topped it off with “Your view?” ^_^
Alright lets begin. I’m gonna try and break it down cuz I don’t wanna miss a single point.
"3 way relationships and open relationships are what give gay guys their awful, slutty image."
Apparently you think that gay people invented open relationships or poly-amory. That’s sort of hilarious. Clearly the gays don’t have a monopoly on this, especially the open thing. But you know what’s more striking about your message? The fact that you talk like this defender of our gay values and our gay rights yet here you are acting exactly like the people that oppress us the most. People that think their own personal truth is the only truth, like how marriage should be defined, what rights we should have and not have and in your case how a relationship should and shouldn’t be. Close-minded, black-and-white, ignorant people (like you) try to bring us down, every day, yet here you are, attempting to diminish and belittle my way of life and my relationship by pretending your world view is the only view.
You basically called me a slut in your first sentence so here’s how you are coming off right off the bat: Sexually Repressed.
"I hate guys who think because they’re gay it means it’s completely acceptable to sleep around, have multiple partners, have partners way too young or old for them…"
You know, you can be the most horrible, degenerate of a person and still be monogamous… just like you can be a good, kind-hearted, law-abiding citizen and be open or poly-amorous. I don’t pretend that being in an open relationship, a poly, or a combination of both is for everyone, or that it is somehow better than a monogamous relationship. See, if I did that then I’d come off ignorant and biased like you. Thankfully, everyone is different and people can find happiness and fulfillment in all sorts of different ways.
So Clif is 8 years older than me. Is that too old for me? You should really create some sort of chart for the rest of us to follow. Should we just stick to our age bracket? How much wiggle room do we get? Damn. That’s pretty stressful, but thankfully you are here to straighten us out.
Seriously though, who gives a shit? At the end of the day the only thing that matters is compatibility and commonality. You can have the most mature 20-something-year-old out there, or a somewhat childish 40-something-year-old guy, and they can meet in the middle and be extremely happy. And that’s without even going into attraction. Some guys like young guys, some like older. Just like some guys like skinny guys, some like chubby guys… Who are you to say what kind of people should or shouldn’t be together?
"…think it’s their right to be treated equally while behaving more like animals than civilized, committed couples in a relationship.”
Now here’s the part where I thought to myself DAMN! This guy has some big hairy balls writing this to me of all people.
Let me educate you on the specifics of my relationship.
I am MARRIED. I have been with this man for approximately 9 years, almost 4 of which as a legally married couple. Clif isn’t my boyfriend, my lover or my partner, he is my HUSBAND, and you wanna lecture me on the definition of commitment? That’s rich.
So first you called me “slutty” and now apparently I’m some sort of “uncivilized animal”. Why? Because we choose not to limit ourselves sexually? Because we have been able to move past the normal insecurities and fears that plague most relationships (gay or straight)? Because we have achieved such an almost zen level of respect and trust for one-another that it allows us certain freedoms without undermining the rock solid foundation that we have built over many years? I think what really bothers you is not that we are somehow ruining the fabric of gay moral values but the fact that we somehow get away with living this sort of open-minded and free lifestyle, which when you add poly-amory to the equation, has been and hopefully will someday be again over-flowing with love. Yet there you are, probably alone, full of limits and boundaries in your head, feeling a little envious.
"It just isn’t right and it isn’t fair for the rest of the gay community who don’t feel that way."
I know. Its very unfair. Here I am obviously ruining your life and your chances at happiness by simply living my life hundreds if not thousands of miles away. Its a travesty.
If you don’t “feel that way” then that’s perfectly fine. No one is trying to change your mind. Live your life whichever way you see fit, but keep your opinions about everyone else’s life to yourself.
And by the way, since you’re obviously the Bill O’Reilly of gay values then what the hell are you doing even glancing at my blog? are you like new here or something? :P
Have a nice day.
I’m not gay (not that it matters) but I could not possibly agree with you more on all counts. Thank you for schooling this ignorant shitstain.
'Twas a busy weekend. Spent the day with Blondie on Friday. Spent the morning at brunch with Blondie and Stiletto (hellooooooo bottomless Bloody Marys!), then hung out with Stiletto in the afternoon while Blondie was out on a date. Out with Canvas Saturday night for dinner and sexy fun. Spent all day yesterday with Carmen shopping for a new car for her (she bought a 2014 Mazda 6—which, I have to say, is a really slick car).
Finally got home in time to have dinner with Blondie and spend the remainder of the evening with her (including more sexy fun!). It’s always nice to wind down a busy weekend with her.
This week should be pretty low-key. Aside from a Wednesday-night meeting with my poly social group, my calendar is quite free. Blondie’s out on a date with her newest squeeze tonight, and I think I’ll just hang out at home and relax.
Oh. Totally unexpected surprise: I woke up to a message from Raven in my inbox this morning. Whoa.